beer, diabetic, gym, love, low carb, Sleeve, Surgery, T1d, Uncategorized, VERTICAL SLEEVE GASTRECTOMY, VSG, weight loss

Overdue 4 month VSG progress update and reacquainting with an old friend

It’s been OVER four months since my Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy and I am a bad blogger for not updating sooner.  I feel like I am currently experiencing 5671275 “WTF’S” per hour:) This time of year is a really busy time for me in my work life.  I don’t have a whole lot of stress in my professional life, but when it comes to months May through July, I am a little over the edge.  BUT- even through the busy times, this year has differed from years past and I’ll tell you why.

In the past, I’d sit down at my computer with a drink and a snack and work until wee hours of the night prepared for my late-July deadline.  Sometimes I’d eat dinner at my desk.  Sometimes I’d not eat at all.  It just depends on how busy I am.  Right now, I am preparing for the deadline and do not feel the need to mindlessly eat and drink while I work.  I find I get up from my desk more to move around…where in years past, I’d sit so long my back and behind would be sore.  My right arm would be so tense from using the mouse and my shoulder would lock up because I had not gotten up to loosen it up.  This year I feel very different, and I mean that in the best way possible.

My mind feels healthy and so does the rest of me:)

I’ve mentioned before that my VSG journey has been pretty much non-eventful with no complications.  I’ve also mentioned before that my progress is MUCH slower than I think other WLS patients experience.  To date, I am about 45 pounds down since mid-February when I started my pre-op, liver shrinking diet. Don’t get me wrong. I am HAPPY to have lost 45 pounds!  I am more than half way to my goal.  I think we generally think that if someone has WLS, we expect huge weight loss numbers in record time.  Lots of people do experience that.  I am just not one of them.  LOL.

As I lose weight, lots of things are happening.  Good things.  I have explored a new area of my closet for smaller clothes! I am no longer in “plus” size clothes, though I probably have a few items of that size because they are comfortable.  But generally, I am in Missy sizes now.  Even my feet are changing…my shoes don’t fit the same anymore, but not so much that I can’t wear them.  It’s just weird.  Good weird. Due to the vitamins I take, my hair, skin and nails are all pretty healthy.  I am moving more fluidly, and more confidently. I can’t say I LIKE ALL the activities I do at the gym, but I find myself choosing more adventurous classes than my typical DREADmill routine.  I find myself sleeping better, eating less, and moving more.  And most importantly, I am remembering what health and fitness feels like.  I still have a long way to go.  But I feel like I have really accomplished a lot these last four months.  Somebody asked me if I am proud of myself.  I wouldn’t say proud…I’d say pleased with my progress.  I’ll be proud when I reach my goal.  I am hoping I reach it by my December birthday.

With weight loss surgery comes some not so fun things, too.  I mentioned having healthy hair- and it is healthy, but I am losing it like crazy.  VSG patients typically lose hair between months 3-9.  When it didn’t happen at 3 months, I figured it wouldn’t happen.  Was I ever wrong!  Now I can really sympathize with my sister and cousin, who both experienced hair loss during their journeys.  It is a good thing I have ridiculously thick hair because it’s working in my favor during this loss stage.  And since I am losing it, I shouldn’t color it.  If you know me in real life, you know that Miss Clairol and I are BFF’s.  I’ve been coloring my hair since I was 13.  My first gray hair appeared and subsequently was dyed when I was 22.  I am 60% gray.  I color every 3 weeks.  Can’t do that now for fear of losing even more.  So…I reckon I’m just gonna go Au Naturale!   Can’t say as I like this.

Then there’s the loss of things we as women really don’t wanna lose.  I gave away 2 brand new Victoria’s Secret bras to my sister, who is already well-endowed.  I did not get those genes.  Teresa got all the boob genes! LOL.

I’ve shared some of the good and not so good.  But I am pretty excited to share with you one of the better things to happen in my post-VSG life. I have reacquainted myself with an unlikely former friend.  And that friend is Sobriety.

At least one of you reading, who knows me and my relationship with beer, has already assumed I am drunk as I type:)   I assure you, I am not.  

Weight Loss Patients are encouraged NOT to drink for at least a year after surgery.  Some will tell you it is because there’s a dependency transfer.  People who are addicted to eating large quantities/bad types of FOOD are food addicts, right?  Well, since our tummies are so small, we cannot ingest those big quantities and bad foods will likely make us sick.  So the food addiction gets transferred to alcohol in SOME patients. (That is not the case for me)

Another reason is that some of our organs, like the liver, are traumatized after WLS and need time to recover.  Adding alcohol to an already-small-as-a-banana-stomach and a traumatized liver may result in damage to those organs. I have not found this to be harmful to me personally, although my doctor did recently say my liver enzyme counts were slightly elevated.  it could be due to medication, though and nothing to do with alcohol.  I would say I have 2 glasses of wine or a cocktail one night a week.  And 2 will do me just fine.  That’s my new limit. Anything more than that will leave me with a splitting headache the next morning. AND alcohol slows down the loss process, in my opinion, so I don’t have much.

In real life, you know that I LOVED beer.  I loved beer like I can’t even describe.  And I live near 4-5 breweries.  My husband and I loved to spend an afternoon tasting different kinds of beers.  He’s an IPA guy.  I am a Hefeweizen kinda girl.  or I was:)  Beer is a no-no due to the carbonation and the carbs.  I was prepared for this when I decided to have the surgery.  so far it has not been hard to comply.  I did have a tiny taste of a blueberry blonde ale a few days ago.  A little taste was heavenly!

Admittedly, I am kinda digging this stage of my journey.  I know my limits now.  That doesn’t mean I won’t test the limits now and again as my body changes.  Don’t worry, my Hot Tub Mermaids, I’ll still be able to have cocktails with you on the beach! I just have to sip them a little slower than usual! But I don’t think I will ever revert back to the frequency of drinking like before.  I have not missed the next-morning headaches or sluggishness.  I have embraced the clarity I feel.  My to-do’s get DONE.  I say all of this now, but my work deadline is coming up and I may just say the hell with it all and drink a bottle of vodka.

LOL.  No, I won’t. For real- I feel strong, and healthy. And I love that so many people in my life, whether we’ve met in the weight loss community, or we’ve been friends for years, the outpouring of support I’ve received has been nothing short of amazing.  If you’re considering WLS and need some guidance, I would love to tell you more about it, and if I am not one to help, there’s a whole WLS community out there that is incredibly helpful.

Thank you so much for coming by to read my little update.  Four months into the journey and it’s not been that difficult.  Who knew I could live without beer or carbohydrates in general?  Who would have ever thought?!?

There’s some crazy stuff happening in our world right now.  Sometimes it is hard to find the silver linings….sometimes it is hard to recognize our blessings.  If you can’t find a blessing….go be one<3




diabetic, diet, insulin pump, love, low carb, Sleeve, Surgery, T1d, Uncategorized, VERTICAL SLEEVE GASTRECTOMY, VSG, weight loss

Post Op: week 11. Milestones and Mayhem

Hello Again:)

I feel like this might be a rambling session today since my thoughts are all over the place, hence the mayhem reference in the title today.

Lots of things going on in my world.  Yesterday was week 11 post op Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy.  It was also the day for my check-in with Dr. Bruce. I wasn’t scheduled to go until my actual 3 month post op visit on 6/3 but we scheduled some time last month for a weight check since his staff knew I was concerned about how slow I am losing.  Since the visit lasts month, I only lost THREE pounds.  Yep.  Their scale yesterday showed only a 3 pound loss. I was heartbroken.  Not surprised, but still heartbroken.

I am losing far slower than anyone could have guessed.  Many VSG patients lose double digit numbers in a month.  I try not to compare myself to others, but it is really hard not to do that when I’ve seen with my own eyes the good this surgery can do on an obese person.  When Dr. Bruce talked with me yesterday, I jokingly said “Last month when I was here, you told me you had only 3 patients out of 900+ who were resistant to sleeve surgery.  I think I may be your 4th.” He replied and said “It looks like you might be.”

And I felt as if each word went directly to my soul and stabbed me.  Immediately, the tears started pouring. I recounted all the pre-op testing, the lifestyle changes I’ve made, the financial burden I’ve put on my family…and the tears just wouldn’t stop. And what’s worse, is that there is no rhyme or reason that a person is sleeve resistant.  You’d think cutting away 2/3 of your stomach would make anyone lose weight, right?  Not so much.

But even though it is POSSIBLE that I am resistant to it, it’s also possible I am not.  Maybe I am just losing slowly and steadily.  Maybe I am being impatient.  Maybe I am doing something wrong with my diet.  I have been very comfortable in this food stage.  I’ve had no issues reintroducing new foods into my diet. Have never really gotten sick…have had no complications.  I weigh my food.  The only time I’ve colored outside of the lines is when I had a cocktail and that has only happened 3 times.  I realize alcohol can slow down weight loss, but I don’t think 3 cocktails at different times is gonna halt it.  I think I got carried away with how comfortable I was and though I log my food in MFP, perhaps I ate too many carbs too often.   I don’t know.  But I DO know I’d rather lose slowly than have complications and lose quickly.  And losing slowly will also help prevent sagging skin and losing my hair.  Those are 2 things commonly associated with rapid weight loss.

The doctor and I talked about next steps to jump start the loss again.  I am going to try to do the protein shakes during the day with a lean/green meal for dinner, much like I did with the pre-op diet.  I did that yesterday and am following it today.  And I am HANGRY.  That is another oddity in this journey.  Most people who have VSG do not feel hunger.  But I do, and I have since the surgery.  I am really reeling in the carb situation.  I thought I was doing really well since I often am under 50 carbs per day.  But I am examining the types of carbs I eat and really trying to eat the good ones.  We’re also trying something I said I’d never do again.  I am back on Phentermine again for a few months to jump start the loss again.  I had tremendous success with it a few years back when I lost 80 pounds. I gained it all back, though….because I didn’t wean myself off of it.  I will follow the rules this time.  It’s for the short term.  I will have to go back each month for a check of my vitals and make sure my blood pressure doesn’t rise. Phentermine gives me a lot of energy, which I love.  But it makes me quite thirsty, which isn’t a terrible thing since I am supposed to have a lot of water anyway:)  I just never thought I’d have a NEED for it again, certainly not after a life-changing weight loss surgery. So, I’ll take my 3 pound loss and move forward.  I was really very upset yesterday.  For a lot of reasons, but that appointment was at 9am and set the mood for the entire rainy day. And I so want to dislike Dr. Bruce.  But each time I am there, he makes a faith reference- almost as if he knows I am really digging deep and finding strength in my faith. I let him know that I’ve been chatting a lot with Jesus about this situation lately:)

There’s another situation at my house that the Big Man and I have been in talks about, too.

There are 2 topics I always talk about.  Weight loss progress (me)  and Type 1 Diabetes (my daughter).  Haley’s 17 and has been a T1D for nearly four years now.  May 29th is her Dx anniversary.  So, we’re not new to T1D but we still learn something all the time.

At her checkup last month, her doctor asked us to try to be more vigilant about taking Metformin, which is actually a drug used in Type 2 Diabetes, but is really helpful for Haley, as it helps break down carb digestion and helps drive her blood sugar down.  We’ve done as the doctor asked.  Unfortunately, Metformin works a little TOO well.  She prescribed 2 pills with food each day.  When Haley takes 2 and also does insulin, her blood sugar plummets to unhealthy numbers.  We have had a series of “lows” in the 40,s, 30’s and even once in the 20’s.  I was with her a couple of years ago when she crashed into the 20’s and I never want to visit that again.  I was losing her.  Haley lost her ability to speak, her eyes were rolling back in her head…her vision was blurred.  My girl was simply checking out on me.  I never ever wanted her to feel that way again.  But it happened again last night because she is still trying to find the balance with Metformin and her insulin pump dose.

When she is low, she starts to feel shaky.  Haley says when she’s in the 40’s, she’s shaky and starts to sweat, and feels sick to her stomach.  In the 30’s or below, she said it’s like a slow, easy, calm drift to sleep.  She loses functionality.  She checks out.  During this time, we guzzle juice and wait for it to come back up.  We have a glucagon kit, which is also nicknamed the “oh shit kit.”  If we’re breaking out Glucagon, we’re past the need for juice, cake icing, etc.  We’re in trouble and a Glucagon shot in her hip/behind area is intended as a last resort before calling 911.

Luckily, the juice (and a PB&J sammich!) did the job because in just  a few minutes, she was laughing and joking with me again.

It is still amazing to me that she can come that close to danger and a few minutes later, she’s completely normal. It’s scary. Amazing. Exhausting.  After a low like that, her body needs time to recover.  She feels terrible for the day.  Kind of like recovering from the flu. I asked if she’d like to lay down with me for a little while and just relax.  Maybe take a nap.  I expected her to say no, to go play video games or watch TV.  Instead, she crawled up in my bed beside me and chatted with me for a few minutes (after she’d drank all the juice and her blood sugar was good) and then drifted to sleep.  My five foot 9 inch , 17 year old “baby” was lying beside me in the guest room.  I laid there with her and played with her hair while she slept.  And a million memories instantly poured into my brain. My husband kept texting me, asking what our plans for dinner were going to be.  I think I texted back and said we’re skipping it because I didn’t want to move from my cozy spot with my girl.  The house would have had to be on fire for me to move.  I wanted to breathe her in and the comfort having her beside me brought me.  I am hoping that she, too, found comfort while she slept next to me.  Sleeping is an issue for me and has since really elevated since her DX.  It is my greatest fear that the “low” will not wake her from her sleep and I will come to find her gone.  It is such a morbid thought, but any parent of a kid with a life threatening illness knows this fear. We’re trying to get a CGM for her)(Continuous Glucose Monitor)  that will show trends in her sugars- whether they are going up or down…and alarms that will be sent to my phone when she’s too high or low.  It’s a pretty penny, but it is needed and will help alleviate some stress in her life…and in mine.  Later when I told her goodnight, Haley said “Hey mom, thanks for saving my life today.” I giggled a little bit and thought…whew…that was a close call today! All a little too overwhelming.

So you take her near-death experience yesterday, combined with the disappointing doctor’s appointment and very little sleep and that’s a yucky day.  My old friend depression showed up yesterday for a little bit….but.  To use the verse from Lamentations 3:23, “God’s mercy and grace are new every morning.”

And a new morning it was.  I reached a new milestone today.  My first in this journey! I weighed myself today and I am happily writing to you from “Onederland.”  Don’t know what that is?  If not, you must not have a weight issue LOL. ONEderland is where you find yourself when your weight begins with a ONE instead of anything else.  That’s right…I just sorta put my weight out here on the crazy internet for all to see.  it’s not like ya’ll were blind to the fact that I am a heavy girl.  SOOO- since my pre-op phase in mid-February, I’ve dropped 31.4 pounds. It’s a little less than 3 pounds a week.  I still call that a win. 31.4 down.  54 to go. Easy, right? Pffffffffftttt.  No, it’s not easy.  But I am doing it.

Thanks for reading and letting me get the emotions out.  Whether 1 person reads or 100 read, it is nice to be able to document my journey and pour my feelings somewhere that people may be able to understand.  Weight loss is super hard.  If it were easy, we’d all be skinny!

I hope everyone has a great evening.  Thank you again for spending your time with me today ❤

Be Blessed,




diabetic, diet, T1d, Uncategorized

Deja-boo, the heart of the matter,and Pinkv.2

Did y’all miss me? All seven of you that read my blog. LOL. Turns out I’m not a good blogger! I’m trying to make a good effort, but I’ve kinda had a busy few months! Hence the catch-all title of today’s entry.

Deja-vu means you’re in a situation you’ve been in or felt before. I have that situation but I’m calling it Déjà-boo because it’s a situation I’d rather not have been in more than once! Haley’s T1D Dx anniversary was Memorial Day weekend. We’re waaaay more well-prepared now, 3 years in, than we were then. Or so we thought. Stinkerbell landed her cute self in the hospital shortly before her sugar-versary. She was feeling awful one morning in May and pleaded with me to stay home. There’s an urgency in her voice when she has a diabetic issue that is far greater than any other. There’s a look in her eyes. Like a glassy, dull expression that I’ve come to recognize. She gets winded. She gets lethargic and it sucks. She didn’t even have to plead her case. I knew by looking at her that she felt bad. She measured for ketones. Our test strips indicated none. She still couldn’t breathe and her heart “hurt ” so to the pediatrician we went. Imagine our surprise when we learned she had a LARGE AMOUNT OF KETONES in her urine. They urged me to take her to Wake Med’s children’s hospital ER. Haley was in mild diabetic ketoacidocis. It’s awful. No wonder she felt bad. Luckily we didn’t have to spend the whole night. If you don’t know what DKA is, and you know/love a diabetic, I urge you to go look it up. Too much of it can send type one’s into diabetic coma.
We chugged water like crazy, she was dehydrated so they pumped her full of good hydration via IV. She rested. We talked. It was an awful day until very cute doctor came in and told her she could spend the night in her own bed. LOL. Diabetics lead a life of highs and lows. Literally! She’s fine these days and enjoying the first few days of summer vacation, and she has her drivers license now!

Before the craziness in May, rewind back to late January, when my husband was sick. If you know me well, you know I’m not one to stay idle even when I’m sick, so it’s hard for me to comprehend how my husband can. And it’s my general opinion that men are the weaker sex when it comes to sickness. In my house I can be crazy sick but the kid needs to get from point A to B, dishes need washing and so do clothes. I still take care of stuff like women are programmed to do. Meanwhile, husband is laid up in bed with NyQuil because he has the sniffles. For the first 2 days of Jason’s illness, I immediately thought he must’ve been hungover. LOL. Or really embellishing because his version of sick and mine are NOT THE SAME.😆

I can tell you that crow does not have nice flavor! I had to eat my words. On day 3 he looked so bad that his skin was gray. No energy. Hard to breathe. Racing heart. Vomiting non stop. He let me take him to urgent care, which is a big deal since he’s only been to the doctor a handful of times since we’ve been together, which is about 20 years! The PA there called EMS immediately and off to Rex we went. His heart rate was 200+ bpm! I followed the ambulance over I my car. Lots of crazy thoughts went through my brain during that drive. Please, Jesus… Let him be ok. …. And he is now. Jason developed an arrhythmia. The ER doctor used the scary paddles on him to reset his heart…. While he was AWAKE! He said it was the worst pain he’d felt in his life. After a series of tests, and a week in the hospital, he left with a shiny new pacemaker at the ripe old age of 44. Yes. I said 44.

So- my family has had some issues of late. In comparison to what’s happened to Jason and Haley, my issues are minor. I’ve had chronic pain in my lower abdomen for several months. Ultrasounds and CT scans showed nothing wrong, though I have sporadic pain that rival pain of childbirth. Tired of having this pain and not figuring out what it was made me turn to an alternative….and so far, I’ve had positive results and minimal pain. Why?

The infamous pink drink you may see my friends post about on my Facebook page. Plexus and I are not new friends. I’ve actually taken the Plexus slim powder for quite some time, but I was not consistent with it. I’ve been really diligent for about a month now. The benefits I’m seeing and feeling are feeling more rested, minimal tummy pain, more energy and I AM SLEEPING, YALL! I have suffered from insomnia for about the last ten years. Now, my sleepless nights are few. Plexus was originally formulated to help type2 diabetics control their blood sugars. Haley is type 1, so she will always require insulin by injection or pump until a cure is found. But- when we visit her doctor this month, I plan on showing her doctor the ingredients in Plexus and have Haley try it with the doctor’s blessing, of course.

Now listen… I’m not so naive to think that some pink power is gonna make me lose a ton of weight. It has worked that way for others. But it’s working for me in various ways.

Plexus is wellness in a bag. If I lose weight with it, GREAT! But if I don’t, I’m good with that, too. I’m FEELING SO MUCH BETTER! And my bloodwork is showing it, too! Cholesterol like check. Blood pressure is perfect. A1C is spot-on. I’m not anemic nor are my potassium levels low like they used to be. I’m 46 and was beginning to feel every single one of those years and I don’t mean that in a good way.

I started hearing about the benefits of Plexus from my sweet girlfriends Micah and Heather, who’ve both had phenomenal results from it. Then I became friends with their friends, Tracy, Melissa, Dee and
Carol. ALL of them have experiences similar to mine. These are not stories from complete strangers. These are people I know!
I’m giving this a second go of it and stay diligent. I added the probio5 and Biocleanse. I need to keep my tummy healthy and out of pain. So far, it’s all good!

My fitness routine has suffered since my ankle surgery last October. I’ve gained all but 23 pounds of the 80 I lost. I gotta resume the activities that made me feel strong. Now that things have calmed down on the home front, I feel like I can turn my setbacks into a big comeback.

Do you want to join me on my Pinkv.2 journey? Whether with exercise or Plexus or both… I’d love to have some company on this journey. It’s easier when you have support from your friends. And I’d love to cheer you on as well.

Thanks so much for reading. I’ve been wanting to post an update for months but had too much going on. And quite honestly, I’ve not felt good. I’ve felt old. Weak. Brittle. But no more. The woman who was a force to be reckoned with took a long hiatus. TOO LONG. But I’m finally ready to enjoy getting that cheerful spirit and healthy mind and body back:)

Shew… That was a LOT of typing! Thanks for taking the time to spend with me. I’d love to hear from you! For all the prayers, calls, emails, texts regarding my family these last few months, THANK YOU! I felt every single one!


diabetic, half marathon, JDRF, T1d

Half Marathon Training has officially begun!

Hal Higdon's training advice
Hal Higdon’s training advice. I CAN do this!

So, friends- it’s on.

There are only 96 days until this event and I cannot run more than 3 miles right now and that’s not really consecutive miles, either!

I did a jog/walk thing this morning.  2 miles on the treadmill and 1 mile run/walk when I got home from the gym since I still had some time to spare before taking Stinkerbell to school.  Hal suggests 3 miles for today.  Well, I did the 3 miles.  I just didn’t do them consecutively:) But I am working on it.  I find I do my best work when I am pressed for time, and that applies to all aspects of my life- work,  home, deadlines- you name it.  I don’t doubt I will do this thing.  I just wanna run at least half of it.

The JDRF  race organizer asked me why I chose to take the Team JDRF challenge for the half marathon a couple of weeks ago.  I replied with my honest answer…that I said I’d NEVER to it again, given the aftermath of the last one I did and my inability to walk for three days.   But as we know, I’ve changed my tune.  She asked if she could publish my reply, hoping to get more runners on the team. I told her she could use my story, and apparently more runners have signed up- not due to my story, by any means- but I am really hopeful for a good turnout at this event.  You just don’t know how precious research organizations will be to you until you or someone you love becomes immediately affiliated due to learning of an illness or disease.  I showed my T1D the response I sent to JDRF.  I hope she knows how proud I am of her.  I hope she’s proud of me when I finish this thing.

You can read my personal page here:  If you feel so inclined to donate to my fundraising efforts, know that I am appreciative.  But I am also just as appreciative for you reading here…for your kind messages and texts/comments.

And this little blurb is what appears on the JDRF Eastern NC Chapters facebook wall.  Not sharing to toot my horn.  Sharing to share my love for my T1D. She’s the reason this is important to me.  It takes $$ to do research to find a cure for Type 1 Diabetes.  It’s my prayer that a cure is found in her lifetime. I am just doing my part while I am here and able  to do it.

She’s the reason I run…

it's for the kid:)
it’s for the kid:)


diabetic, love

To Love a Diabetic

My Haley sent this to me tonight.  She’s been a T1D for about 9 months now. While I read this, I realize the author is writing about loving a diabetic, but not always the mother-child relationship.  She’s talking about all relationships, whether they are husband and wife, or friend to friend…even in our short time of dealing and learning about Diabetes, we have encountered highs and lows on almost a daily basis.  I love that Haley sent this to me.  Words could never say how much I love that kid. 
I love the author’s words…but they are both filling and piercing my heart tonight.
Get your tissues ready and don’t say I didn’t warn ya. Especially you “Dmoms and Ddads”.

To love a diabetic is to be a doctor. It means helping her to remember her medications. It means driving her for an hour to the only 24 hour pharmacy when she’s gotten the flu and can’t take the Nyquil in the refrigerator. Or driving her to the hospital when the simple flu turns into bronchitis and her blood turns acidic.
To love a diabetic is to be patient. It means knowing that some days she won’t feel good for no visible reason. It means canceling long term plans when suddenly she doesn’t feel well enough to go on a trip. Or waiting to go to bed while she injects her bedtime insulin.
To love a diabetic is to be a priest. It means consoling her when she’s tired and feels like she can’t do it anymore. It means listening and not passing judgment while she tries to figure out her new dosages and makes mistakes. Or, during those tough times, listening to her burial wishes- just in case.
To love a diabetic is to be a guardian. It means standing up for her when strangers accuse her of being a drug addict. It means discreetly asking her friends to keep an eye on her when she’s testing new medications and doesn’t know the reactions to her body yet. Or staying up with her through the night because she’s too afraid to fall asleep where a coma can find her.
To love a diabetic is to not be superficial. It means seeing her bruises as beauty marks. It means caressing the scars across her stomach. Or kissing her dry lips when she is hooked to IVs.
To love a diabetic is to be understanding. It means knowing that she doesn’t mean to get hot tempered when her blood sugars are too high. It means listening to her when she asks to start a family soon. Or donating time and DNA to sciences you don’t fully understand just because she asks you to and because it promises to cure her.
To love a diabetic is to be smart. It means researching new medications even though she never asks you to. It means listening to her explain her new findings in terms that aren’t typical language. Or making her smile when she desperately wants to scream.
To love a diabetic is to be selfless. It means going to a restaurant based off the carbohydrates menu instead of the atmosphere. It means going without dinner when money is tight because you can buy her medication with it instead. Or testing your blood sugar on her new meter to make sure it’s working properly even though you’re terrified of needles.
To love a diabetic is to be brave. It means keeping your chin up while she talks about those scary moments. It means not allowing her medical mistakes to colour your relationship with her emotionally. Or keeping positive spirits even though all of the websites and gatherings tell you she won’t statistically make it past her 40s.
To love a diabetic is not easy. It means putting her medical needs before any other finances. It means worrying every moment that she is properly cared for even when you can’t see her. And it means trusting her life in the hands of so many doctors who don’t understand the full complexities of the disease.
Thank you for loving a diabetic.
by: Katherine Marple
Copyright 2010 Katherine Marple